On Monday Tom and I celebrated our 9 year anniversary. While we have been through a lot together it doesn’t feel like nine years. On Tuesday the California Supreme Court ruled that the change to the California State Constitution was in fact a constitutional but the gay couples who did get married could keep their status. I am happy for those couples, Tom and I are not among their ranks. I am far too stubborn to be pushed into anything at any speed other than the one I set. I want to plan, send out invites and have a celebration. I don’t want to have a ceremony and a rushed party and of course I don’t want to do anything if some ignorant bastard can take it away. What good is the word forever when some uneducated idiots believe they are the only ones to live the life “ever after.”

Of course I say all this and yet I have never said yes to any of Tom’s proposals. I want it all. I want to have it on my terms. I want to ease into it and not have to jump in like a member of the polar bear club into icy waters. Of course I also am a bit of a Buddhist at heart and I believe nothing is forever, change is inevitable, and having a ceremony to claim you will be together forever seems a bit naive. I’m not saying Tom and I won’t spend the rest of our lives together, but my Mom and Dad never divorced and yet he is now alone and her energies have gone elsewhere. I think once I am allowed to marry Tom without a forced rush we will have a wonderful celebration.

But back to the point of my ramblings. The last few days have been a bit emotional for me and I decided to make a podcast that exemplifies the emotional journey I’ve been on, from sadness and despair to anger and power.

This wrong will be righted! Justice is for everyone.


California Supreme Court Just Us - Mixed by Monkeyx3

Track List (Title-Artist-Album)
Another Heart Breaks - Electric Light Orchestra - Time
Belfast / Wasted - Orbital - Wasted - The Best Of Volume Part 1 (Disc 1)
Istanbul Uyurken (Hamam Trance Version) - Steam/ Hamam: the Turkish Bath
Tor-cheney-nahana (Howie B Left Foot Mix) - Indiens-Sacred Spirit- Dance Remixes
Give Up But Don't Give Out (Portishead Remix) - Primal Scream - The Trip Hop Test - Part Two
Ball - Craig Armstrong - Astralwerks 1999 v.2
This Must Be It - Röyksopp - Junior
Map Of The Problematique - Muse - Black Holes & Revelations
Infidels Of The World Unite - Fischerspooner - Entertainment
This Is Life - Grace Jones - Hurricane
The Best Revenge - Fischerspooner - Entertainment
Hurricane - Grace Jones - Hurricane