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Yesterday I took the day off of work to go with Tom to visit his dad in the Vacaville hospital. I knew Tom would need my support. His dad’s health has been failing so quickly a decision had to be made as to keep fighting or let him go. The whole family was there, brother, sisters, an uncle and cousins. They all agreed, his remaining liver was only functioning at 17%, he had pneumonia, his gout had taken over his arms, his body was filing with painful toxins and he couldn't eat or drink because his body liver wouldn’t process it. He was thirsty but they had to refuse to give him water. It was heart breaking. They decided not to subject him to surgery for a new pacemaker followed by dialysis which would all have to be done with minimal painkillers. The Doctors were not very optimistic that if he did make it though all this his situation would improve.

Tom asked his dad if he wanted the dialysis or if he wanted to go see ma. He said he wanted to see his Rose again. They called a priest who came and gave him his last rights, it really made me tear up. My heart broke. Tom wanted to go with Barbara today so I went to work.

He called me when I was coming back with lunch for my coworkers, “He’s gone, I was holding his hand when he went, so it’s ok...”


( 13 comments — Leave a comment )
Jan. 12th, 2006 10:56 pm (UTC)
Gosh, I'm sorry. That's really sad.
Jan. 12th, 2006 11:03 pm (UTC)
Our thoughts are with you and give our love to Tom.
Jan. 12th, 2006 11:14 pm (UTC)
Dear God.

*hugs* both for you and for Tom.
Jan. 12th, 2006 11:27 pm (UTC)
my condolences to you and Tom
Jan. 13th, 2006 12:27 am (UTC)
if i could i'd run up to you and give you a big hug. i know you guys had an interesting relationship and i remember previous posts you made about him. i'm glad he's no longer uncomfortable/in pain.
Jan. 13th, 2006 04:59 am (UTC)
I'll be thinking about you and Tom over the next few days. You know that if you need ANYTHING at all, we are a phone call away.
Jan. 13th, 2006 05:35 am (UTC)
That's really sad...

But at the same time it's beautiful that he knew what he wanted and was able to leave with loved ones and family around him. At least he's at peace now...
Jan. 13th, 2006 07:10 am (UTC)
Oh man. Our thoughts and prayers are with you and Tom and his family. Give him a big hug from me & Nicole.

Jan. 13th, 2006 02:42 pm (UTC)
That's heartbreaking. You need a hug and so does Tom. But like others have said, at least the poor man doesn't have to suffer anymore and he didn't leave this world alone.
Jan. 13th, 2006 03:31 pm (UTC)
*hugs* to you and Tom.

Jan. 13th, 2006 03:55 pm (UTC)
My thoughts with you both, and with the whole family.
Jan. 13th, 2006 09:19 pm (UTC)
oh! i'm so so sorry. please give tom my love and love to you to.
Jan. 14th, 2006 06:01 pm (UTC)
that's so sad. Condolences to you and Tom. His dad is in my prayers...
( 13 comments — Leave a comment )