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Positively Negative

Some people cling to the negative. The safety of negative holding them in stasis. No need to try, no chance to fail. Some people cling to the positive, they live in perfection and no problem is allowed to affect them. Neither state is healthy, yet so many of us live in them.

Half full or half empty... I say the healthiest way to see the cup is just half. You must balance the positive and the negative. It is said we don’t learn from our successes as much as we do our failures, but our failures whittle away at our confidence and self esteem. And it the pressure and tragedy that makes things beautiful and relevant. Would we care about Romeo and Juliet if their families approved. What if snow white was never poisoned and Cinderella's carriage not returned to the state of a pumpkin? I know life doesn’t have a happily ever after. I feel sorry for the people who chase after those words. But it is important to realize that when you wake up from the poison apple to note your accomplishment. I was poisoned and I survived, my friends helped pulled me through.

But a constant downward free fall are hard to witness let alone endure... Like the movies Happiness, Gummo, and Love Liza.

I guess what I am trying to remind myself and a few other people of, is that it’s OK to be negative as long as you are learning from it. You don’t have to try to be positive all the time, but you should at least try to be looking for the light at the end of the tunnel... Despite your beliefs that it’s just some asshole with a torch bringing more work. Tell yourself, you see the light. There is no shame in complaining about your situation, it’s good to vent. But if you vent and and vent and vent, yet take no action people are going to stop listening. After all what would the point be. But if you need to vent some negativity and you aren't beating a dead horse, let it out.

This post isn't directed at or about any one in particular, i've just noticed a theme in my friends list and it got me thinking...

I know I complain about my work here a bit. I was set to quit, I updated my resume, but wanted to wait until after I returned from my vacation to find a new job. Now that I’m back things have changed, the man I hated like no other is being exiled to Los Angeles, YAY! I still have doubts about the morals of management but I also realize how good I have it, I have more vacation time than most Americans will ever get. Of course, if Pixar offered me a job with almost no vacation, I would ask them how high they wanted me to jump.

Radio Faggot #3 - DJ Earworm - www.radiofaggot.com


( 10 comments — Leave a comment )
Oct. 8th, 2005 01:37 am (UTC)
mmmm Pixar!!
Oct. 8th, 2005 03:08 am (UTC)
hmm! thanks for the point to ponder, oh and btw, hi, i'm chris, i added you, the other day :)

so hmm

i'm positive in hiv status which makes me kind of negative toward myself, but i'm really positive about the people i know, and them being good to me, and all that la la la stuff.
and everyone thinks i'm a big ball of fun until i go suck on a tailpipe for like.. an hour.. and land myself in the hospital for a few days. LOL
the days seem past though
i'll be chewing on that a while :)

Oct. 8th, 2005 03:59 am (UTC)
Well said.
Oct. 8th, 2005 05:58 am (UTC)
man, i was a negative ninny all week at work. sorry!
Oct. 8th, 2005 06:42 am (UTC)
Thought-provoking and interesting stuff. You make a number of good points that are very close to my heart.

I strive for positivity, and want to spread positivity. If I am in darker days, I try to find the lesson in them, and if I can, pass that lesson on. It's my goal, but sometimes I fall short. I do tend to give myself a hard time if I am negative, so your words are really food for thought. Oddly, if someone else vents, I support their right to do so: I just beat myself up for doing it!

I'm so glad things at work are getting to a better place for you. We aren't defined by our jobs, but they are integral parts of our lives, and when they are a source of stress, it really hurts.

And by "we", I do mean you and I, and not a general "we humans".

Thanks for posting this.
Oct. 8th, 2005 06:58 am (UTC)
Word. I recently figured that no matter whether I am negative or positive, I often use my realisation as a way to avoid change and learning rather than to embrace it. In other words, when things go badly, I think - oh, things are going badly, well it must be out of my control. When things go well, I think, oh good, I must be doing something right. I'll just continue as I am.
Oct. 8th, 2005 07:26 am (UTC)
i think the thing in my own life that i don't have enough of is patience. when good things happen i get greedy and lose patience waiting for more and more. when bad things happen i want them to be over quickly and lose patience when people take their own time or seem to be in my way of moving on. couple all that with the lethargy and stagnancy that i've been experiencing the last 3 years or so and you might be able to start describing my current state of mind. i keep saying over and over again that i need to move on... and then i don't.

it's weird that sometimes i imagine that i'm being thwarted by something/someone as most of my efforts towards change that i've tried in last while seem to have gone awry or nowhere. of course recently i've been starting to remember how i used to look at things when i was in my early 20's: try your best to achieve the goals you have in mind but don't get upset when you don't seem to be making any progress. when i was younger it was much easier to take this perspective because i thought i had all the time in world. as i get older i feel more time-constrained and automatically get more panicky when i feel i'm not going anywhere. i've always had some fairly good luck (except when it comes to the big things) and maybe i just need to look at the last three years a little differently. maybe not getting into grad school is a good thing, maybe not getting a library job until about a year ago is a good thing, and maybe being single for the last two years is a good thing. maybe all those things (and others) have been directing me and shaping me for something that is in my future that i wouldn't have had otherwise, something which i want more than any of those small things.

how's that for a ramble?
Oct. 9th, 2005 11:16 am (UTC)
>I still have doubts about the morals of management

Morals have no place in management. Management is there souly for the purpose of maximising stockholder profit. You're a cog in that wheel. Sorry if this sounds a bit communist, but its best not to look for management morality anywhere. If there ever was such a thing, its long gone in this day and age.
Oct. 11th, 2005 06:39 pm (UTC)
i am reading you.
Oct. 24th, 2005 08:53 am (UTC)
Yeah, it seems all I do is bitch about my ex lover. I’m feeling a good reevaluation coming on. :>)
( 10 comments — Leave a comment )