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It's been a while since I've written. I have been have a rough time recently. Too much life changing horrible things have been happening. I am really beginning to loath September. It's a bad month. Why you may ask, besides 9/11 that is? Well here goes; The weekend before this last one was going great, Tom and I were going with Joanne Dana to out friend Lanny's house to make and eat Tamales, then a shopping spree at Ikea. I Love Ikea. At Lanny's house we were having a great time, eating and talking then cleaning up a bit when Tom's phone rang. It was about Tom's best friend in the whole world, Evie Doggart.

When I first met Evie in London with Tom a few years back it was quite a trip; everybody knew her, all her friends had there own talk show or were busy acting in big name movies. People on the street would come up to her and ask if she knew who the killer on Eastenders was,(She was a recurring character on Eastenders). you can see some of the stuff she has been in at http://us.imdb.com/Name?Doggart,+Evelyn Tom Evie and I had a ton of fun running around London. We almost got kicked out of the Tate Modern for taking pictures inside the warhol exhibit, closed down restaurants trying all the Bison Grass flavored Vodkas, and really ate tons of greasy food while meeting all of Evie's friends. You can actually see all the pictures of our trip at http://homepage.mac.com/macboysf/PhotoAlbum1.html It's a lot of pictures thought just warning you. Evie made our trip amazing, So much energy, there really is no way to describe. Evie and her bo Greg really took good care of us.

The girl on the phone with Tom was Evie's cousin Julie, she was calling Tom to let him know that she was dead. Tom's was just a 10 days away from a month long visit to Evie and Greg in their Nottting Hill home. He was going to help Evie with her new little Baby Iggy. He is only four months old. Tom had a whole suitcase of cool clothes Evie would love for little Iggy.

Evie had Post Pardumn depression and had gone to the Doctors for help, they prescribed medication that would not effect her breast milk. She went with little Iggy To her parents house in the country. Early Saturday morning she went out to the train station to meet Greg who was coming up to be with her. She hadn't slept in five days and something crazy, something not Evie, made her jump in front of a train.

Greg's train was delayed due to an incident on the tracks. He had no idea anything was wrong until he got to the train station and did not see Evie, he saw her father.

It has been said that her doctor did not prescribe the right medication, that five days with no sleep would... but it doesn't bring her back. She had everything, everything she ever wanted. Her beloved Greg and Iggy, Light Fame, a beautiful house in Notting hill, great friends and enough Money to not have to worry, but all that was taken away.

My poor little Tom left today to make and Eleven hour flight to London to go to her Funeral and see how he can help Greg with anything he needs. The stress from this, on Tom is truly awful. I have never in my life seen someone in this much pain. He has been coping with it quite well but has understandably lost it a couple times. This past weekend after buying a new Suit and some clothes for his trip, I lain out one of his new sweaters on the bed because it hadn't dried completely. While I was in the Shower one of the cat's claws snagged the sweater and the last of Tom's nerves. He lost it, All of his pain, all his frustration with the world, his anger; It all got lost in that snag, and he began to yell.

He yelled as we got in the car to go pick up Dana from the airport. I know my little Tom, he was yelling at me, but I know he was really yelling at the world, so I sat quietly, arguing would only make things worse and he really needs to yell, even if it's not directed in the right direction, he just needs to get it out. I can take it.

Tom made the statement that he always apologized for yelling at me but he wouldn't this time, this time he would not take it back. It was now quiet, we were about to enter the start to the Oakland Bay Bridge, when my cell phone rang. It was Kim, my roommate from Market House, I answered, "Hi Kim how are you?" "Not good", she said as she began to cry. "Oscar's dead!" The rest of the conversation is pretty much a blur. She told me he was over at his boyfriend David's house Saturday and was really tired, too tired. David took Oscar to the emergency room and he just passed away, something about an enlarged heart. After I hung up, Tom started to apologize, he still hasn't stopped, I'm hoping he will read this, and forget about the fight. I never took any of it as anything more than pain misdirected.

I found out latter that Oscar spent Twelve hours waiting to be treated, They thought he was O.D.-ing so they didn't give him any priority. They had asked him about Drugs, he said no that he had a history of heart problems but they didn't believe him. Oscar in the past has been quite the little fiend, but since he's been with David he has really cleaned himself up and has been so good. He was not on drugs and was not over dosing. Because he kept passing out they wouldn't give him any water, for twelve hours, and they gave him a catheter because they were worried he would wet himself and they would have to clean it up. They of course do this without any sort of pain killer. I am so appalled at how they treated him. They sent him down to X-Ray (I still don't understand this one) for X-Rays?!?!? They took a person with a sprained wrist in front of him. And when it was finally Oscars turn, the X-Ray Tech told David to leave, Oscar begged to please let him stay, that he was scared and wanted David to stay. The Tech made him leave, and David went into the hallway, and sat down in a chair, an minutes later heard "Blue Line in X-Ray" and Oscar was gone, while he was alone and scared.

Two senseless deaths in one week. I am so scared about the theory that things happen in threes, I can't handle a third. It's already too sad.


( 5 comments — Leave a comment )
Oct. 13th, 2004 01:19 pm (UTC)
How awful
I came across your journal and when I read this it just broke my heart.


Oct. 14th, 2004 04:47 pm (UTC)
Re: How awful
Thanks, it's hard to believe it's been over two years.
Oct. 15th, 2004 06:28 am (UTC)
Time is funny like that.
Some people's deaths seem to fade more quickly than others.

Well chap. Have a great weekend.

Feb. 16th, 2005 06:26 am (UTC)
god. how awful. how have Evie's and Oscar's families moved on? how have you?

Feb. 18th, 2005 07:56 pm (UTC)
Evie's father has never recovered, neither has Tom really. I haven't had much contact with Oscar's family because they live so far away, but they seem to be doing well. Oscars father is such a sweet man, he still stops by to visit Kim when he is in town. I think I have fared rather well but bete_lumineux did get to see my cry the other night when I was talking about Oscar... and of course it was less than an hour after I told him I never cry.
( 5 comments — Leave a comment )