Monkey! Monkey! Monkey! (monkeyx3) wrote,
Monkey! Monkey! Monkey!

The pained smile of work to be done.

So much has been going on and yet I haven't gotten a chance to organize my thoughts enough to put them to pixels. I had an amazing Time with Dana. I miss her so much. I had a few moments of sad blue alone coldness. I am finally beginning to build up a new group of real life friends.

Who I am going to become.
I am strong. I have won my battles with fear and I am confident. I don't rely on others to make choices for me. I am not afraid of going out and having fun or building up expectations of others. I don't stress about disappointing others. I am happy within myself. I go out and do things by myself and make new friends wherever I go. I have parties that people always want to attend. I have let go of the feelings of not having enough time. The guilt over things I am unable to do are no longer a problem. My smile is always sincere and never a mask to hide pain. I feel free to share any of my thoughts with those close to me. I learn new things daily and take classes for fun. I create art even if it is just for myself. I am making my own music video for a song I like, using places that I love in San Francisco as the backdrop. I am the person I want to be.

One More Time - French Kicks - The Trial of the Century
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