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I have been going through all of my emails as I sit on a boring conference call when I see and email from someone I don’t know that doesn’t appear to be spam so I click on it to read it and gasped. I don’t know if anyone on the conference call heard the air being sucked into my lungs in a staccato of panic. The email was sent from someone named 2HOT and the subject was Re: Two hot guys looking... (it was truncated) but as I clicked on it the subject became, “Re: Two hot guys looking for bottom to take turns fucking - 35 (lower nob hill)” I thought to myself wow... This is some really fancy spam to know areas of the city I live in... And then I read on:

send us some pics and a description

age/height/weight?

>(my full name and < email address > )wrote:
>
>I WOULD LIKE TO HAVE THAT BIG COCK IN MY ASS I'M GOOD SHAPE MUSCLE
>GUY . FREE STD HVI NEG . I CAN TAKE CARE BOTH.

My name... My full fucking name... There is no way spam could have that. And this wasn’t an add it was a booty call. Headline: Identity theft reaches online sex ads. Are you sleeping with who you think you are? This is where I gasped. I hadn’t put up any ads and hadn’t answered one either, yet I have this email... And wait a second... There are more replies. I quickly read them... Phone numbers email addresses. My brain was moving fast trying to figure it out. I totally stopped listening to the conference call. I tried to logically think my email program had just added my name to the email address but that really can’t happen. But as a stared there jaw limply hanging I caught a bit of the conference call that applied to me just in time to know I needed to answer and had a vague idea of what was asked... Guessed correctly and gave my 25 cents and went back to trying to figure out why someone was using my name and email address on craigslist for sex. I was most upset about the name and was the add placed by “me” or was I replying to the ad because there were lots of emails from so many different addresses?

It wasn’t until after the call had ended and I started to type this up that I figured it all out. The emails were all sent while I was gone. They were sent to my yahoo account. We had a house-sitter taking care of the cats and the apartment while we were gone, I logged into yahoo to print out my plane ticket before I left and must have forgot to log out. Our house-sitter was welcome to use the computer and surf the web... He must have accidentally used my email when he was cruising. What a relief.
I just wonder what the two guys thought of the short built Mexican with the most recognizably Irish name since Patty Séan O’Guinnes (this is actually pretty close to my name by the way).

When I came home the house was so incredibly clean I wondered if the sitter had any fun at all. Now I know he had a lot of fun. Now the question is... How fun should I make it when I tease him about this?



Help Me - Kelis & Timo Maas - Destroy All Humans (Soundtrack)

Comments

( 9 comments — Leave a comment )
grubbybastard
Mar. 22nd, 2006 08:50 pm (UTC)
Best post ever!!!
grubbybastard
Mar. 22nd, 2006 09:32 pm (UTC)
P.S. Are you going to forward those emails to me? Just curious.
ewe_2
Mar. 22nd, 2006 09:06 pm (UTC)
OMG! You must have been shitting bricks until you figured it out! LOL

Too funny. I could picture everything I read.

:-)

D
ncsuj
Mar. 22nd, 2006 09:16 pm (UTC)
OH MY GAWD!
I would rag him about it HARD HARD HARD. I would also be a little upset if he was giving strangers my address to come fuck. But moreso, I would NEVER let him live that down.
_kaiser_
Mar. 22nd, 2006 09:48 pm (UTC)
that reminds me of something very similar that i did when i was housesitting for friend a number of years ago. i realized after i had left their place that i had left some rather incriminating evidence. they never brought it up afterward and i'm very very glad they didn't.

however, i do think you should definitely tease this friend good and hard. he deserves it just as i certainly did then.
write_like_krzy
Mar. 22nd, 2006 09:59 pm (UTC)
I don't even know where to begin with this one. :P
traylordean
Mar. 23rd, 2006 12:42 am (UTC)
Tee hee
et_blackbird
Mar. 27th, 2006 10:08 pm (UTC)
So, how did you end up teasing him?

That is disturbing on some levels though. I'd have been totally freaked out, and probably would've gotten rid of that e-mail account, and had many other panicked reactions.

"I can take both"... shudders.
monkeyx3
Mar. 28th, 2006 01:11 am (UTC)
"I can take both"... shudders.
now he didn't say at once... and his English isn't perfect. I haven't teased him yet. I haven't had a chance. What good would trashing email accounts do. The damage to my name has already been done! Ha ha!
( 9 comments — Leave a comment )