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Hard to believe...

It's really hard to believe that it's only been a year since I was awoken by a phone call informing me to head for the hills, World War Three had begun. Frightening thought that when I turned on the news I was a little relieved. This past year really has been eventful and full of lots of things for me to think about. It really does seem like 9\11 happened years ago. Since then I've moved, my new housemate was attacked and moved, I found out I was allergic to the kitties I live with, I've dropped a couple of false friends, my company changed names a few more times and had a few more layoffs. But I've also had some pretty amazing things happen as well. I've been getting along great with Tom even after two years, I've gone on trips to London and Mexico, I have purchased way too many expensive things (I just noticed after 9/11 my rate of buying really expensive things has really gotten out of control.) and I survived all the layoffs at my company. Out of 5000 people there are only 100 still working here.

I'm still having problems reigning in the WTC. it really does feel as if a piece of my heart is missing. I definitely lost a bit of my innocence, I lost that little glimmer that everything would work out. I had always felt that I had a charmed life, even though it was far from perfect; now I feel I have just been lucky thus far and who knows when that luck will run out. I am slowly getting my optimism back, but it is hard when I see and hear the backlash. Hatred and revenge are terrible things. Evil begets evil, so they say. I really hope that Bush does not start another war. You have to wonder, If there was no oil in the middle east how many peoples lives would have been saved. Would we be thinking about war with anyone? I truly dislike the Oil industry, they seem to be a greedy monster who think of human lives as only names on paper, ready to be crumpled up and tossed out to make room for money. Try as I might to stay balanced, I can't this day is too much. There is no way for me to be positive. Maybe by next year.